Attention Moms: Our Children Don't Have to Love Us

Recently I have seen blogs mom and mom say something like "always your mother" or "do not love but still love you" and I feel like it's time we all take a few steps back and we Have some verification of the reality:
Our children should not love us.
Love is a beautiful thing. Our world works and depends more than any other basic principle. It is the foundation of our relationships with our friends, family and children, but deep and honest love is not involved nor necessary. It is not given freely. You win.
I have heard many mothers say that love has gained by 9 months of pregnancy and the agonizing birth hours, but that's just not true. Birth is an astonishing thing. The gift of creating, transporting and giving life to birth in this world, it is as sacred as the earth itself, and it is something that we as women always have a deep attachment to. But, of course, this is not what gives us the deep and affectionate connection that many of us think for our mothers.
No one remembers the day they were born, but remember that our closets were examined by monsters and taken every day from school to ballet, football and home with a mother exhausted with sweat pants when Even managed to make us dinner once when he kicked the big tennis shoes of his feet covered with blisters and rubbed his temples, lest his head could explode. We remember endless sacrifice and support, love, worship, friendship and pride.
We remember the time when our mothers trained us in the people we are today because they are children (little people, yes, but nevertheless people). And people like to grow through coherence, support and communication. If your child does not get these things from you, there is a genetic component within those that makes you love. Five, ten, and twenty years down the road, keeping us remembering our mothers after nightmares, giving advice when we are lost in the woods, and sustaining us continuously as we pursue our dreams.
These are the things that make a mother a mother, and these are the things that allow us to develop a lasting, loving relationship with our children. Our children are autonomous beings with individual emotions arising from their personal perception of the world, and we must honor that. These are the things that we, as mothers, must remember every day.

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Five Ways To Get Your Dog's Attention

One of the most common problems I see with dog owners is the issue of how to get your dog to pay attention to them. It may be the best coach in the world, but if a dog does not look on you, who cares? Here are some tips on how to involve your dog and the training much easier.
1. Be something that your dog wants to look. Is it easier said than done? Very probably. But it is so important to remember that we are always in competition with the environment for the care of our dog, and if we do not make an effort to be interesting, chances are that the environment will win this battle. When I work with a dog, I communicate as if speaking to a child - with excitement, purpose and wonder !! I am very happy of the world! Just change my voice is often enough to attract the attention of a dog, but also use body language and movement as well. One thing I have learned in my coaching experience - you must be willing to make a little crazy yourself if you want to train a dog. They will always pay more attention to the person to be a bit of a blunder - use it to your advantage!
2. Reward properly and often. There is a chain of events that see very often in the context of human-dog interactions and that goes a little something like this: dog does something wrong, the owner called the dog dog owner, the dog is scolded for bad behavior. Maybe this seems like a reasonable chain of events but what is really happening here is that the dog is punished for coming to the owner and pay attention - not the behavior that the owner thinks he scolded. Eventually, the dog learns that "dog! Come here "I mean," I'm crazy and something unpleasant happens! " and the dog chooses to ignore requests for attention. Obviously, this is not good or what we expected. But if you want a dog who really pay attention and comes when called, it is essential to be rewarding every time. This can mean food rewards if you wish, but be enough praise, affection and play. Make sure that every time the dog responds to command attention, it is worth your time.
3. Commitment of practical training. compromise formation is exactly what it sounds like - your dog training to work with you. I like to work on compromise formation ... a lot of fun for the dog and handler as well. Some dogs are naturally caring and committed to their owners ... but most do not! And although many people spend a lot of time to teach a dog a command library, do not spend time training the dog to run, which is the most important dog training in my opinion part. This type of training teaches the dog to see you often, and more rewarding than to pay attention to you and the environment.
4. Put it in time. We hope your dog is already check how many times and giving you plenty of eye contact, it is always important to have a "clock" solid control in emergencies and other things. Take the time to train this reliably control your dog. And not to abuse it! I see all the time - the owner asks the dog to "look ... ... watches ... !!!! WAAAAATCHH !!!!!!!" and the dog is completely foreign. If what is happening with your dog, your dog does not know what this order and you have to start training again from the beginning ... preferably using another word as a sign. The word "clock" has become synonymous with "ignore me."
5. To establish that for success. Do not expect your dog to give attention to the solid rock at all times without taking the time to train and cultivate. This means start their training in a low to no distracting environment and work up to more and more distractions. It does not start in the middle of a crowded park for dogs and expect your dog 100% dedicated. time and training.

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